Just got an HD telly - also just discovered HD is a bloke thing!
 

Max Demian wrote:

Damn! That was a genuine mistake. I still think 'beetle' looks wrongly
spelt. I wonder why the spellchecker didn't pick it up?


Like this? (My spiel chucker objects to "mussed" which is a perfectly
good word)

Andy

CANDIDATE FOR A PULLET SURPRISE
I have a spelling checker.
It came with my PC.
It plane lee marks four my revue
Miss steaks aye can knot sea.

Eye ran this poem threw it,
Your sure reel glad two no.
Its vary polished inn it's weigh.
My checker tolled me sew.

A checker is a bless sing,
It freeze yew lodes of thyme.
It helps me right awl stiles two reed,
And aides me when aye rime.

Each frays come posed up on my screen
Eye trussed too bee a joule.
The checker pours o'er every word
To cheque sum spelling rule.

Bee fore a veiling checkers
Hour spelling mite decline,
And if we're lacks oar have a laps,
We wood bee maid too wine.

Butt now bee cause my spelling
Is checked with such grate flare,
Their are know faults with in my cite,
Of nun eye am a wear.

Now spelling does knot phase me,
It does knot bring a tier.
My pay purrs awl due glad den
With wrapped words fare as hear.

To rite with care is quite a feet
Of witch won should bee proud,
And wee mussed dew the best wee can,
Sew flaws are knot aloud.

Sow ewe can sea why aye dew prays
Such soft wear four pea seas,
And why eye brake in two averse
Buy righting want too pleas.

Jerry Zar, 29 June 1992
Northern Illinois University
DeKalb, IL 60115

Just got an HD telly - also just discovered HD is a bloke thing!
 

We were somewhere around Barstow, on the edge of the desert, when the
drugs began to take hold. I remember airsmoothed
saying something like:

Having said that, a few months back I decided to switch the Digibox to
RGB, having used it on composite for 9 years or so. To me the
difference seems obvious on reasonable quality source material ( sky
arts 1 for example) but neither of my teenaged daughters or wife even
noticed. They're also quite happy to watch everything in
stretchyvision with all those short fat people etc.

Enable SCART switching in the digibox.

Just got an HD telly - also just discovered HD is a bloke thing!
 

Java Jive said...

"Do you smoke after intercourse?"

"I dunno, I've never looked!"

I say! Do you file your toenails?



--
Ken O'Meara
http://www.btinternet.com/~unsteadyken/

Just got an HD telly - also just discovered HD is a bloke thing!
 

On 26/03/2010 18:39, Albert Ross wrote:
On Thu, 25 Mar 2010 10:47:00 -0000, "Max Demian"
wrote:

Only a deranged Designer would wire up the retina so that the nerve fibres
block the light path.

They had the blueprint upside down

Seriously though, it's a bizarre system that seems to work in terms of
reducing a bitmap to vector graphics for distribution, then
reconstructing the bitmap from the vectors and filling in the missing
bits

Ouch! Someone has constructed MPEG-2 inside me head!

--
Adrian C

Just got an HD telly - also just discovered HD is a blokething!
 

On Sat, 27 Mar 2010 13:15:29 +0000, UnsteadyKen wrote:

I say! Do you file your toenails?

No, I put them in the garbage container.

Just got an HD telly - also just discovered HD is a bloke thing!
 

In article ,
J G Miller wrote:
On Sat, 27 Mar 2010 13:15:29 +0000, UnsteadyKen wrote:

I say! Do you file your toenails?

No, I put them in the garbage container.

So not clip art?

--
be an optical Aleutian*

Dave Plowman London SW
To e-mail, change noise into sound.

Just got an HD telly - also just discovered HD is a bloke thing!
 

"UnsteadyKen" wrote in message
m...
Java Jive said...

"Do you smoke after intercourse?"

"I dunno, I've never looked!"

I say! Do you file your toenails?


Yes...
I can't see well enough to cut them.

Just got an HD telly - also just discovered HD is a bloke thing!
 

On Sat, 27 Mar 2010 22:12:09 +0000, Java Jive
wrote:

Not until Tracey Emin finds them ...

On Sat, 27 Mar 2010 17:11:05 +0000 (GMT), "Dave Plowman (News)"
wrote:

So not clip art?

heh heh

I think it was an old Larry cartoon of the guy cutting his toenails
over the edge of the bath, and the clippings were ricocheting off the
wall, the ceiling and another wall and dropping neatly into the hand
basin

Just got an HD telly - also just discovered HD is a bloke thing!
 

On Sat, 27 Mar 2010 14:00:51 +0000, Adrian C
wrote:

On 26/03/2010 18:39, Albert Ross wrote:
On Thu, 25 Mar 2010 10:47:00 -0000, "Max Demian"
wrote:

Only a deranged Designer would wire up the retina so that the nerve fibres
block the light path.

They had the blueprint upside down

Seriously though, it's a bizarre system that seems to work in terms of
reducing a bitmap to vector graphics for distribution, then
reconstructing the bitmap from the vectors and filling in the missing
bits

Ouch! Someone has constructed MPEG-2 inside me head!

That too, it's basically what the JPEG and MPEG guys have been working
on, finding out which information can be dropped without anyone
noticing. Kinda the opposite of what the BBC and especially Channel
Five are working on :(

Just got an HD telly - also just discovered HD is a bloke thing!
 

On Fri, 26 Mar 2010 20:18:29 +0000, Andy Champ
wrote:

Max Demian wrote:

Damn! That was a genuine mistake. I still think 'beetle' looks wrongly
spelt. I wonder why the spellchecker didn't pick it up?


Like this? (My spiel chucker objects to "mussed" which is a perfectly
good word)

Andy

CANDIDATE FOR A PULLET SURPRISE
I have a spelling checker.
It came with my PC.
It plane lee marks four my revue
Miss steaks aye can knot sea.

Eye ran this poem threw it,
Your sure reel glad two no.
Its vary polished inn it's weigh.
My checker tolled me sew.

A checker is a bless sing,
It freeze yew lodes of thyme.
It helps me right awl stiles two reed,
And aides me when aye rime.

Each frays come posed up on my screen
Eye trussed too bee a joule.
The checker pours o'er every word
To cheque sum spelling rule.

Bee fore a veiling checkers
Hour spelling mite decline,
And if we're lacks oar have a laps,
We wood bee maid too wine.

Butt now bee cause my spelling
Is checked with such grate flare,
Their are know faults with in my cite,
Of nun eye am a wear.

Now spelling does knot phase me,
It does knot bring a tier.
My pay purrs awl due glad den
With wrapped words fare as hear.

To rite with care is quite a feet
Of witch won should bee proud,
And wee mussed dew the best wee can,
Sew flaws are knot aloud.

Sow ewe can sea why aye dew prays
Such soft wear four pea seas,
And why eye brake in two averse
Buy righting want too pleas.

Jerry Zar, 29 June 1992
Northern Illinois University
DeKalb, IL 60115

Even funnier if you run it through Word's spell checker

No mis-spellings and only 5 grammatical errors!

Keith