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"Small fish and chips please."

"You want peas, beans, or curry?"

"Oh, nothing, please."

"Notting?"

"No."

"OK, I give you free sausage, nice sausage!" He brandished the sausage. He's
a cheerful man and very friendly. Doesn't have very good English, but makes
up for it with his beaming smile.

"Well, I'd never say no to a nice bit of sausage. . ." I paused, then added,
" . . . as the actress said to the bishop."

The sausage on his fork halted momentarily in mid air and he frowned
slightly. Then he continued his movement, passing the sausage to the local
woman who works alongside him. With no discernable reaction to anything she
added the sausage to the fish and chips, her eyes dull. "Wrapped?" she
managed to utter.

Before I could answer her the boss, who had been staring into space with a
quizzical expression, almost jumped in the air. "So actress like sausage
from bishop! I know what sausage! Ha! Ha ha ha!"

"Yes please," I said to the woman, who reacted only by wordlessly wrapping.

"I know, I know!" said the proprietor, warming to his theme. "Actress like
sausage! Bishop like to geeev sausage! Ha! Ha ha ha! I know, I know! Ha! Hee
hee!" He glanced sideways at the woman, who remained totally unmoved.

There were no other customers, so he felt he could relax for a moment. "Ah
yes, sausage, bishop. You know, when I was boy, many years ago, 1963, 1964,
my uncle he went to see bishop."

"Really?"

"Yes, he bad man all his life, stole watermelons from field, you know, then
one day went to see bishop. Next day went to mountains. We never see him
again. He send one letter - now I am monk!"

"Blimey. I suppose he must have seen the light."

As I went out of the door the woman spoke up. "Monk my arse. Actress in the
mountains more likely!"



Bill

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On Jun 2, 5:16*pm, "Bill Wright" wrote:
"Small fish and chips please."

"You want peas, beans, or curry?"

"Oh, nothing, please."

"Notting?"

"No."

"OK, I give you free sausage, nice sausage!" He brandished the sausage. He's
a cheerful man and very friendly. Doesn't have very good English, but makes
up for it with his beaming smile.

"Well, I'd never say no to a nice bit of sausage. . ." I paused, then added,
" . . . as the actress said to the bishop."

The sausage on his fork halted momentarily in mid air and he frowned
slightly. Then he continued his movement, passing the sausage to the local
woman who works alongside him. With no discernable reaction to anything she
added the sausage to the fish and chips, her eyes dull. "Wrapped?" she
managed to utter.

Before I could answer her the boss, who had been staring into space with a
quizzical expression, almost jumped in the air. "So actress like sausage
from bishop! I know what sausage! Ha! Ha ha ha!"

"Yes please," I said to the woman, who reacted only by wordlessly wrapping.

"I know, I know!" said the proprietor, warming to his theme. "Actress like
sausage! Bishop like to geeev sausage! Ha! Ha ha ha! I know, I know! Ha! Hee
hee!" He glanced sideways at the woman, who remained totally unmoved.

There were no other customers, so he felt he could relax for a moment. "Ah
yes, sausage, bishop. You know, when I was boy, many years ago, 1963, 1964,
my uncle he went to see bishop."

"Really?"

"Yes, he bad man all his life, stole watermelons from field, you know, then
one day went to see bishop. Next day went to mountains. We never see him
again. He send one letter - now I am monk!"

"Blimey. I suppose he must have seen the light."

As I went out of the door the woman spoke up. "Monk my arse. Actress in the
mountains more likely!"


I'm sure the watermelons up in the mountains were an attraction too.

Splendid, thanks for a veritable smorgasbord of an anecdote!

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"Mizter T" wrote in message
...


Splendid, thanks for a veritable smorgasbord of an anecdote!

Cheers! I drove home with my chips this dinnertime thinking, "I must write
that down!" There's nowt so queer as folk. I showed the story to Hil and she
laughed, because she knows the chip shop man. He's a breath of fresh air
after the last set of miserable sods who had it.

We've never been able to figure out the deal with the 'small fish and
chips'. He calls it the 'pensioners' special' but of course I refuse to ask
for it by that name. The board says, 'with beans, mushy peas, or curry', but
in fact I have known people get a sausage even when they've had one of the
stated options. It's £2.70, not bad for a decent dinner.

Having munched my fish and chips, relishing the batter, I went down to the
surgery to get my blood test results. Cholesterol sky high! Oh bugger!

Bill

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Bill Wright wrote:
"Mizter T" wrote in message
...


Splendid, thanks for a veritable smorgasbord of an anecdote!

Cheers! I drove home with my chips this dinnertime thinking, "I must
write that down!" There's nowt so queer as folk. I showed the story
to Hil and she laughed, because she knows the chip shop man. He's a
breath of fresh air after the last set of miserable sods who had it.

We've never been able to figure out the deal with the 'small fish and
chips'. He calls it the 'pensioners' special' but of course I refuse
to ask for it by that name. The board says, 'with beans, mushy peas,
or curry', but in fact I have known people get a sausage even when
they've had one of the stated options. It's £2.70, not bad for a
decent dinner.
Having munched my fish and chips, relishing the batter, I went down
to the surgery to get my blood test results. Cholesterol sky high! Oh
bugger!

They do medium fish & chips with peas and curry sauce for £3.50 where I
live. The (mainly Greek) staff seem incredulous that I don't want peas or
curry sauce. I assume it's meant to take away the taste of the stale fish
and reheated chips?

(kim)

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"kim" wrote in message
...
Bill Wright wrote:

They do medium fish & chips with peas and curry sauce for £3.50 where I
live. The (mainly Greek) staff seem incredulous that I don't want peas or
curry sauce. I assume it's meant to take away the taste of the stale fish
and reheated chips?

Oh, the fish and chips are nice from this one. And I'm still reeling from
being charged ony £1 for a small chick and chips in St Pauls, Bristol, a few
weeks ago.

Bill

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"Bill Wright" wrote in message
...

Now forwarded to your ISP as they have confirmed you are
repeatedly breaking the Acceptable User Policy.

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Clive wrote:
"Bill Wright" wrote in message
...

Now forwarded to your ISP as they have confirmed you are
repeatedly breaking the Acceptable User Policy.

Which would mean Bill would be party to your actual identity...

So I don't think so, idiot....

--
Adrian C

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Now forwarded to your ISP as they have confirmed you are
repeatedly breaking the Acceptable User Policy.

What a whopper! You well know Bill's ISP would not disclose anything of the
sort to you.

Peter Crosland

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"Clive" wrote in message
...

"Bill Wright" wrote in message
...

Now forwarded to your ISP as they have confirmed you are
repeatedly breaking the Acceptable User Policy.




Bitter, bored or flat-footed? Which? :/
--
Legend11